EU Parliament Gears Up for Another Riveting Week of Democracy (Yes, Really)
The European Parliament is rolling out the red carpet—or at least the beige bureaucratic one—for its March 25-26 plenary session, and they’re so excited about it they’re holding a press briefing at 2:30 PM today. Because nothing says “breaking news” like a pre-game show for parliamentary proceedings.
This week’s legislative jamboree promises to be a real page-turner. On the menu: a debate about the March 19 summit (because apparently one summit wasn’t enough), discussions on keeping Europe’s lights on without bankrupting everyone, and the ever-thrilling topic of energy affordability. Riveting stuff.
But wait, there’s more! MEPs will vote on implementing the “Turnberry deal”—which sounds like a golf tournament but is actually about EU-US trade. They’ll also tackle what to do with non-EU nationals staying illegally (spoiler: they want them to leave), simplify AI rules (because the first draft was presumably written by an AI having an existential crisis), and figure out what happens when banks go belly-up.
Oh, and they’re cleaning up Europe’s water too. Because between trade wars, AI regulation, and banking crises, someone remembered that clean drinking water is probably important.
For journalists brave enough to attend, the briefing will be available in the Anna Politkovskaya press room or via livestream—complete with interpretation in English and French. They’re using something called “Interactio,” which requires specific browsers and devices, because apparently Zoom was too mainstream. First-timers are advised to log in 30 minutes early for a “connection test,” which is EU-speak for “please don’t embarrass yourself on live stream.”
Democracy: it’s complicated, it’s multilingual, and it requires tech support.