EU Leaders Gather to Discuss Everything (Again)
In what has become Europe’s favorite recurring meeting, MEPs spent Wednesday doing what they do best: assessing other people’s meetings. This time, they dissected the March 19 European Council summit with European Council President António Costa and Commissioner Valdis Dombrovskis, because apparently one meeting about a meeting just isn’t enough.
Costa kicked things off by championing multilateralism and international law—you know, the usual Tuesday stuff—while insisting the EU’s energy strategy is totally working, guys. Rising energy prices? That’s just proof we’re on the right track with decarbonization! It’s like saying your diet is working because you’re constantly hungry.
The big talking points were predictably dramatic: supporting Ukraine “as long as it takes” (which sounds romantic until you remember it’s about war), completing the single market (only been working on that for a few decades), and the mysterious “28th regime”—a magical system that would replace 27 different national laws so Europe can finally compete with “the giants.” Spoiler: the giants are probably not losing sleep.
Commissioner Dombrovskis chimed in about Ukraine aid, Middle East tensions, and the ever-popular topic of simplifying EU rules—a goal so ambitious it makes climbing Everest in flip-flops look reasonable.
MEPs then did their thing: some praised unity, others blasted Hungary for blocking Ukraine funds, and a few criticized the Emissions Trading System for being expensive (shocking, we know). There was also the standard debate about whether to speed up or slam the brakes on the green transition, because why agree on anything?
The takeaway? Europe remains committed to supporting everyone, everywhere, while somehow also lowering costs, simplifying everything, and becoming more competitive. Easy peasy.