EU Parliament Channels Its Inner Superhero for Ukraine’s Fourth War Anniversary
Well, folks, it’s been four years since Russia decided to crash Ukraine’s party uninvited, and the European Parliament just threw an extraordinary plenary session that was basically the political equivalent of a group hug with teeth.
Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy dialed in from Kyiv (because apparently Zoom diplomacy is still a thing) to remind everyone that Putin’s “mentally unstable dictatorship” – his words, not ours – continues to be the neighborhood bully nobody asked for. His main point? Putin simply can’t handle the fact that some people prefer living without, you know, constant oppression.
European Parliament President Roberta Metsola kicked things off with the rallying cry that would make any motivational poster jealous: “Ukraine’s security is Europe’s security, Ukraine’s freedom is Europe’s freedom.” It’s like a political version of “we’re all in this together,” except with actual consequences.
The MEPs weren’t messing around either. They passed a resolution (437 votes in favor, because apparently 82 people were having a different day) that basically told Russia to pack up its tanks and go home. They’re demanding everything from releasing kidnapped Ukrainian children to permanently decommissioning the Nord Stream pipelines – because nothing says “we’re done with you” like shutting down the gas station.
The Parliament also called for Ukraine to get NATO-level security guarantees, more sanctions against Russia, and a complete energy divorce. They even want to ban Russian military personnel from entering Schengen countries, which is the diplomatic equivalent of changing the locks.
Zelenskyy wrapped up by reminding Europe that Russian energy money is literally funding the war, so maybe it’s time to finally break up with that toxic relationship. He also stressed the importance of giving Ukraine an actual EU membership date, warning that without one, Putin will spend decades playing divide-and-conquer with Europe like it’s a particularly nasty board game.
Four years in, and the message is clear: Europe’s not ghosting Ukraine anytime soon.