Brussels Gets Busy: Your Speed-Round Guide to This Week’s Parliamentary Circus
If you thought your Monday was packed, spare a thought for the European Parliament, which is cramming more action into one evening than most people fit into a week.
Kicking things off at 16:30, the Parliament’s press team will host a last-minute briefing—because apparently “last-minute” is now an official scheduling category in EU politics. Nothing says “we’ve got this under control” quite like a hastily arranged press conference.
The real headliner? Air passenger rights are getting a makeover. MEPs will huddle in the ominously named “Conciliation Committee” to decide if they like the new rules enough to give them a thumbs up. For anyone who’s ever been stranded in an airport eating overpriced sandwiches, this one’s for you.
Meanwhile, EU-US trade talks are heating up around 18:15, featuring preferential treatment for American goods and—wait for it—a special zero-tariff deal for lobster. Yes, lobster has its own legislative file. Democracy is beautiful.
But the evening’s pièce de résistance comes at 19:15 with the AI Act debate, which includes a ban on “nudifier” apps (exactly what it sounds like, unfortunately) and systems creating child abuse material. Finally, legislators tackling the internet’s darker corners with actual consequences.
Also on the docket: Belarussian journalist and Sakharov Prize winner Andrzej Poczobut will chat with MEPs, committees will vote on migrant return policies and genomic crop techniques, and everyone will probably need a very strong coffee.
Democracy: it’s not pretty, but someone’s got to do it—preferably before dinner.